GA-7 / PERSONAL LOG
EN /
0000-00-00T00:00:00Z

// Personal · Off-record

Notes between shifts.

Written by hand. Kept on paper. Typed here, only because paper doesn't survive atmospheric re-entry.

An unknown carrier

Forty minutes ago, the antenna array picked up a new carrier. I was the only one in the building. The lights in the corridor were off. I do not, as a rule, write log entries about a transmission before it has been catalogued. I am writing this one now because I do not know what the catalogue will say.

The drift is constant. The modulation is unlike anything in the archive. Two words have resolved so far. I will not write them here until the decode is complete. I will only say that they are short, and that one of them begins with a vowel.

I have not notified the day shift. I want to finish the decode alone. If I am wrong about what I think I am hearing, I would prefer that no one else know that I once thought it.

anomaly tr-0015 unconfirmed

Re-decode of TR-0014

The drift is no longer drift. It's intent.

I spent the night re-running the decoder on TR-0014 with a different noise floor. Three of the words I had filed as "uncertain" came back clean. One of them is the word "here". They are still saying here. They mean it geographically. They mean it temporally. I don't think they know which, yet.

I'm not going to mark this as a re-decode in the official archive. It would imply I had doubts. I have no doubts. I just wanted to be sure.

first-contact anomaly

Operator on shift

New operator arrived today. Younger than I expected. She asked, in the first hour, whether the signal was "real". I didn't know how to answer. I said it was received, which is the only word I am willing to commit to.

She watches the waveform like it's a sleeping animal. I think she'll be fine.

personal

On the DANGER entry

TR-0009. "Do not answer." Forty-seven repetitions.

I've read it through, slowly, in the dark, three times now. It is not a threat. It is a warning. There is a difference. A threat comes from someone who wants something from you. A warning comes from someone who has seen what you might want, and is trying to keep you from getting it.

I am filing this here so that, if I am wrong, at least someone will know I considered being wrong.

anomaly tr-0009

The Gliese message, again

I've been thinking about Gliese-581g's request. They asked us to invent a device that could fold an unpleasant truth into time. The implication being that some truths are too heavy to inherit.

I don't know whether we have such a device. I think we have always had it. We just call it different names. Memorial days. Photo albums. The way we tell the same story to a child, slowly, leaving out the parts that would frighten them.

I don't think we need to invent the device. I think we need to admit we already use it.

gliese-581 personal

First night alone on shift

The antenna array hums at a frequency I have stopped noticing on most nights. Tonight I noticed it.

The waveform on the monitor is, technically, just a graph. A line that goes up and down. But at 1 AM, when the only other sound is the heater, the line begins to feel like breathing. I have been told, by people who have worked here longer than I have, that this is a phase, and that it passes.

I am writing it down so that I will remember, later, that I once thought the universe was breathing with me. Even if it was just a phase.

personal